


Fresh Start

by disneyswiftie



Category: Andi Mack (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Aromantic Ace Character, Closeted, Expulsion, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Muffins, No Good Hair Crew, Romantic Soulmates, Self-Acceptance, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates, The Swing Set (Andi Mack), andi & buffy don’t exist, anger issues, expelled, past bullying
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-23
Updated: 2020-10-13
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:08:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 12,579
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26624170
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/disneyswiftie/pseuds/disneyswiftie
Summary: Soulmate AUIn this universe, the very first nickname your soulmate gives you is engraved on your ankle exactly 30 minutes after they first say it to you.Cyrus starts grade 10 at an alternate learning school to avoid bullying. TJ starts at the same school in a fresh start program after being expelled from 3 different schools. Little do they know what will happen when they cross paths.~Tyrus fanfiction~Clean
Relationships: Cyrus Goodman/T. J. Kippen
Comments: 28
Kudos: 59





	1. Introduction

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry in advance if the style names I put are a bit stereotypical, but I couldn't really think of anything else.

Character Descriptions

**Cyrus Goodman**

_Age:_ 15

 _Orientation:_ gay; mostly closeted

 _Best friend:_ May

 _Appearance:_ brown hair; brown eyes; 5'6

 _Style:_ innocent (e.g. button up shirt)

**TJ Kippen**

_Age:_ 16

 _Orientation:_ gay; closeted

 _Best friend:_ none

 _Appearance:_ dirty blond hair; green eyes; 5'10

 _Style:_ troublemaker (e.g. ripped jeans; edgy graphic t-shirts)

**May (original character)**

_Age:_ 15

 _Orientation:_ ace/aromantic; open; doesn't feel the need to "come out", as most people don't care about lack of attraction

 _Best friend:_ Cyrus

 _Appearance:_ strawberry blond hair (long); light blue eyes; 5'3

 _Style:_ girly/innocent (e.g. knee-length skirt with leggings)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Each chapter will be either Cyrus or TJ's point of view, alternating evenly. The first 2 chapters will be the same day but in a different POV, same for chapters 3 and 4. But after that, every chapter will be entirely new scenes.


	2. One // Cyrus

"Hurry up, Cyrus, you don't wanna be late for your first day at your new school!"

I slip on my socks and head out of my room.

"Coming, mom!" I shout back. I don't know why I'm so nervous. This alternate learning school is supposed to help me avoid the bullies from my old school. So I should be happy, right?

Except I know exactly why I'm nervous. This school happens to have a program for students who have been expelled from other schools in the district. Not looking forward to being with bad kids and possibly being teased again. I know they separate the programs in different rooms, but it's possible to cross paths during breaks or after school.

Also, I'm still waiting to meet my soulmate and that just makes everything ten times more nerve wracking. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention. 30 minutes after your soulmate calls you a nickname for the first time, it appears engraved on your ankle. It's pretty cool, but I probably don't even have a soulmate so I don't know why I bother hoping for one to come. Who would ever like _me_?

Of course, not everyone has a soulmate, especially if you're not attracted to any gender. Even before I met my best friend, May, I knew it was possible because I looked up all the orientations when I found out I was gay. She is ace and aromantic, so she doesn't have a soulmate.

I walk downstairs and enter the kitchen, where my mom has just finished making pancakes. She sets them down on the table in front of me, syrup already on top.

"Thanks, mom," I tell her, and gobble down my breakfast.

"So, are you excited for your new school? You know, May is going, too, so you won't be alone," my mom informs me.

"I know, mom. She told me almost two and a half months ago at the start of summer. And I guess it'll be alright."

"Well, we better get going. Grab your bag and get in the car."

"Alright," I respond. I throw my backpack over my shoulder and head out the door, my mom following behind.

* * *

I meet up with May at the front of the building when I arrive.

"Hey, Cyrus! How are you?" she asks as I walk up to her.

"I'm alright. Just nervous. What about you?"

"Me too, but it'll be okay Cyrus, trust me."

"Thanks, I just don't know how I feel about being in the same building as a bunch of expelled kids who could possibly be dangerous."

"Cyrus, I'm sure anyone actually dangerous would be sent to military school or something and not here, with kids needing help for anxiety."

"You're probably right. Thanks, May," I say, and smile at her gratefully.

"No problem, Cyrus," she tells me.

We walk inside, and check in at the office. Then the teacher shows us to the classroom, and we sit down next to each other, somewhere between the front and back rows.

"Hello Cyrus, May. I'm glad you both could make it. Here are your course packets. Cyrus, you will be working on Grade 10 advanced mathematics." The teacher hands me my course packet. "And May, you will be working on Grade 10 applied French." He hands May her course packet.

"Thanks, Mr. Branch. When is lunch time?" May asks. I just nod my head. My anxiety causes me to be very shy.

"Lunch will be at 12:30. If either of you need any help, just raise your hand. I'll be over at my desk over there." Mr. Branch gives us a friendly smile and then walks over to his desk.

May and I get our school supplies out of our backpacks, and get to work on our individual courses.

About an hour in, I hear an argument coming from the front office between what I assume is a student and the secretary.

"What do you mean I have detention?! I'm not that late, I just slept in a bit!"

"Mr. Kippen, it's been an hour since you were supposed to arrive. I'm not going easy on you, given your track record of misbehaviour."

"Are you kidding me?! That has nothing to do with this!"

"Do I look like I'm kidding? You have after school detention today, and that's final."

"Ugh, this is so unfair!"

I then here a thud which sounds like the kid kicked the front desk or something, followed by quick footsteps fading away. I assume he ran off somewhere. Oh well. It's not my business.

I turn my attention back to my work.

'3x + 4(5x ÷ 2x) = __

If x equals 7, what is the answer to this equation?

(Hint: use BEDMAS)'

_Let's see,_ I think, as I write stuff down. _3x equals 21, 5x equals 35, and 2x equals 14. 35 divided by 14 equals 2.5. 4 times 2.5 equals 10. 21 plus 10 equals 31! I got it._

I write down the answer at the bottom of the page, underneath my previous steps.

Pretty soon, it's lunch time. I walk to the cafeteria with May (yes, we do everything together, we've been friends since grade 6) and we stand in line. I see a limited amount of chocolate chocolate chip muffins, my favourite, which excites me. But then I count the people in front of us and there aren't enough to go around. I nervously bite my lip, hoping that not everyone takes one. As the line moves forward, the plate gets more and more empty.

Suddenly, I am startled by the door opening to let another student into the cafeteria. After calming myself down from the jump-scare (I know, I'm dramatic, deal with it), I turn around and see a tall, blond guy with dark ripped jeans and a black graphic t-shirt that says 'Don't Mess With Me'. I didn't see him in my class so he's probably one of the expelled kids! I inch closer to May, and hide my face with my arms.

Oh no, oh no, oh no. What is he going to do to me? _Relax, Cyrus. Maybe he didn't notice you,_ I think to myself. _He probably doesn't even care about anyone unless they bother him. You'll be fine._

Then I hear a voice in front of me.

"What's wrong? Are you alright?" I take my arms off my face and see the guy standing there.

"U-uh nothing. I-I just was hoping for a ch-chocolate chocolate chip muffin but there's only o-one left. But i-it's okay," I stutter out. May holds my shoulder protectively.

Well, that was partly true. I do want a muffin. But that's not why I'm anxious. I'm actually just scared he's gonna hurt me or tease me or something. You never know with these guys. Especially when they wear a shirt that says 'Don't Mess With Me'.

Shockingly, he smiles at me. What? Then he walks past the line of people and grabs the muffin, glaring at anyone who protests. He walks back over to me and hands me the muffin.

"Here. You're welcome," he says. My mouth hangs wide open.

"Wha- but y-you didn't have to do th-that I mean it's fine I-"

He cuts me off by saying, "I know, but I wanted to. Enjoy your day, muffin."

I watch him walk out of the cafeteria with no food for himself.

"What just happened?" May asks me, still looking at the door, wide-eyed, like me.

"I-I don't know he just came in an-and I was scared and then he talked to me and got me a muffin and then he _called_ me 'muffin' and I'm so confused and I don't-"

"Cyrus, relax," she cuts me off, putting her hands on my shoulders. "You don't have to get so worked up about someone being unexpectedly nice. Let's just think about this later."

I take a few deep breaths in and out. She's right. I'll be fine. I just need to get it off my mind somehow.

"You're right. You're always right. You know, he's probably just messing with me. I'll just forget about it," I tell her.

I know I _should_ probably forget about it. But I can't help thinking, he's really cute...


	3. Two // TJ

*BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!*

I slam my hand down on the snooze button of my alarm clock and curl back up under the covers. I just need 10 more minutes and I'll be good.

In what feels like the blink of an eye, I wake up again and check the time. _9:30 AM_.

Ugh! I'm late! School started half an hour ago!

I roll out of bed and scramble to get my clothes out of my dresser drawer.

First day at my new alternate learning school. I am _not_ looking forward to it. I got expelled from my last three schools, so my mom thinks this fresh start program will help 'fix' me.

Except I don't have a problem. Okay, I may have anger issues. But I didn't deserve to be expelled. It's the same thing every time. I see a kid being picked on by a homophobic brat, I yell at the bully, I beat them up. I'm _protecting_ those kids. But it's always me that gets in trouble rather than the bully.

It just hurts me when I see someone being bullied due to their orientation. It's not right. People should be able to be comfortable in their own skin, and be allowed to love who they love. Also I'm gay, so it pains me more than it would the average bystander.

 _Well, I'd better get ready,_ I think to myself. I groan in exhaustion as I drag my feet towards the bathroom to get dressed.

Once I'm changed, I get downstairs and grab some cereal. My mom is reading the newspaper and drinking tea at the table.

"Hey, honey. How'd you sleep?" she greets me.

"Hi mom. I slept alright. Are you driving me to school or am I taking the city bus?" I ask.

"I'll drive you. Hurry up and finish your breakfast, you slept in and you're already late."

* * *

After I arrive at school, my mom tells me to have a good day and lectures me to not get into any fights.

"Yeah, yeah. I know, mom. I'll be fine. Bye."

I walk towards the front doors and she drives away. _Here goes nothing._

I step inside and head to the front office.

"Hey. I'm here. Where's my class?" I say, tiredly.

"You're late. Detention," the secretary says and hands me a detention slip.

Now I'm angry. I'm only late because I couldn't get to sleep last night and had to sleep in! It's not my fault!

"What do you mean I have detention?! I'm not that late, I just slept in a bit!" I tell her, my voice raising in volume.

"Mr. Kippen, it's been an hour since you were supposed to arrive. I'm not going easy on you, given your track record of misbehaviour," she informs me.

"Are you kidding me?! That has nothing to do with this!" I scoff.

"Do I look like I'm kidding? You have after school detention today, and that's final." 

"Ugh, this is so unfair!" I shout, and kick the desk.

I take off running out the door. I don't know where I'm going, I just need to get away from this stupid school. I can't handle this.

I eventually find myself near a lake, about 5 blocks from the school. There's nobody nearby, so I slide my back down a tree until I'm sitting, hugging my knees to my chest. I'm scared. If my mom finds out I got detention, she'll scream at me and take my phone away for a week.

I may often seem like I don't care about anything or anyone, but that's just a facade. I do care, a lot. And the only thing that helps me with my problems is music. I _can't_ go without my music. And I can't listen to music if my phone gets taken away.

I just want someone to care about me, and understand that my life isn't what it seems. I struggle with anxiety and dyscalculia, and sometimes it feels like I have nobody. I mean, my mom's there, but she doesn't understand. She doesn't even know that I'm gay, and I'm too afraid to tell her.

I bury my face in my knees, and start to silently cry. The tears burn in my eyes and I can't take it. Why can't I just find my soulmate already? I just want someone who will care and help me through this, and for me to help them through their problems.

Suddenly, I'm startled out of my thoughts when I hear police sirens. Great. Just what I needed.

The cop gets out of his car and comes over to me. I quickly dry my eyes and face before he gets here and stand up.

"Are you TJ Kippen?" he asks me.

"Y-yes why?" I stutter. I've never seen a police officer in person so this is scaring me.

"Your school called and said you ran away, so we've been searching for you. I have to bring you back," he tells me.

"O-k-kay. I'm sorry," I apologize.

"You seem to be having a rough day, so I'll let you off with a warning. But if it happens again, you'll be in trouble."

"Th-thank you. It won't happen again."

"Good. Now, come get in the car and I'll drive you back," the police officer says.

* * *

After I got back to school, we sorted everything out at the front desk and I cleaned up my face in the bathroom before heading to class. That was an hour and a half ago.

Now it's lunch time and so I put my work in my bag and go to the cafeteria.

When I open the door and walk in I immediately spot a shorter, brown-haired boy turning around to look at me. He moves backwards, closer to the girl behind him and covers his face with his arms.

He looks so innocent and adorable and I think he's scared of me. I feel my heart drop to my stomach. I don't want him to be afraid of me, so I take a deep breath and walk over. I decide to act oblivious and ask what's wrong. I don't want to freak him out by telling him that I know he's afraid of me.

"What's wrong? Are you alright?" I ask the boy, politely.

He takes his arms off of his face. "U-uh nothing. I-I just was hoping for a ch-chocolate chocolate chip muffin but there's only o-one left. But i-it's okay," he stutters out.

Then I see the girl starts to hold his shoulder protectively, while eyeing me suspiciously. Is she, like, his girlfriend or something? I feel like rolling my eyes, but refrain.

I give him a smile before instinctively walking past the line of people. I grab the last chocolate chocolate chip muffin off the plate, and glare at a few protesters. I walk back over to the smaller boy and hand him the muffin.

"Here. You're welcome," I say.

His mouth hangs wide open for a few seconds. Then he stutters out, "Wha- but y-you didn't have to do th-that I mean it's fine I-"

I cut him off. "I know, but I wanted to. Enjoy your day, muffin."

Then I walk out of the cafeteria, forgetting to get any food for myself. Oh well. I'll eat later.

As I walk back to my desk, I think to myself, _Enjoy your day, muffin?? How much of an idiot are you?! He's gonna think you just flirted with him! You literally called him muffin. You may as well have said a corny pick up line!_

I take a few deep breaths and try to calm myself down. It'll be okay. Maybe he just thought I was being friendly. _A little too friendly, don't you thi- STOP!_ I cut myself off in my thoughts. _Just focus on your work._


	4. Three // Cyrus

After I get home from school, I drop my bag off in my room and decide to go to the swings.

The swings is the place I go to whenever I feel bad about myself or just feel worried or sad. Well, right now I'm worried I might have a crush on the bad guy because he was nice to me. But I'm also worried because it might be a trick.

I walk out the door and put in my earbuds. I like to listen to soft music to calm myself down.

Once I arrive, I take out my earbuds and put them in my pocket. I sit down on the swing and slowly sway back and forth. I don't like to swing high because I'm afraid of falling off.

Eventually I hear a voice behind me.

"Hey."

I turn around and see the guy from the cafeteria. He's now wearing a green camouflage hoodie which covers up his 'Don't Mess With Me' shirt.

"U-um hi," I stutter, mentally facepalming at myself. I really have to work on that. I can't be stuttering all the time, it's not normal.

"Chocolate chocolate chip muffin, right?"

I nod. "Scary cafeteria guy?" I ask, not really in much of a question voice.

He looks a bit offended. "Actually, TJ."

"I'm Cyrus," I tell him, still a bit nervous.

"Do you come here a lot?"

"Yeah, kinda. Usually when I feel bad or worried about something."

"Does it help?"

"It helps me," I say.

"Cool. Let me try." He sits down on the swing next to me.

"So what are you listening to?" I ask, noticing the one earbud in his ear.

His eyes widen as he looks momentarily panicked. He takes the earbud out and stuffs it into his pocket.

"Uh, nothing. It's not important," he insists, as he starts to swing.

He starts swinging really high and says, "this is so fun! Come on, swing higher!"

"No thanks. I don't swing higher than this. It's safer this way."

"Oh, come on, it'll be fun!" He jumps off his swing and comes up behind me.

"Ahh!" I scream as he pushes me higher and higher on the swing. "Ahhh!!"

"Underdog!" he yells as he runs under the swing.

"That was exhilarating! But no more please."

"Aw. Okay, fine," he fake pouts.

"So, you gonna tell me what you were listening to now, or?" I turn to face him.

"Um..." he starts.

"Yes?"

He mumbles something under his breath.

"I couldn't hear you, TJ."

He mumbles again.

"TJ...I'm not gonna make fun of you. It's fine, everyone has different music taste."

"It's Taylor Swift," he states bluntly.

"Oh, cool. I like her music. What song?"

He looks panicked again and suddenly blurts out, "Uh-uh, Don't Blame Me!"

I get a smirk on my face and tease, "that's a pretty relationship-based song. Does somebody have a crush?"

"What, no! It's just a cool sounding song, ya know?"

"Oh alright," I decide to drop it.

He gets on the swing again.

"So what about you? That girl that was with you in the cafeteria, is she your girlfriend?"

I somehow choke on air and then start laughing.

"No, most definitely not. She's just been my best friend for a long time, so she's very protective of me. I've never liked her like that and she doesn't either."

"How do you know for sure she doesn't like you?"

"She's ace and aromantic so she doesn't like anyone that way."

"Oh. Is she okay with you telling me that?"

"Oh, yeah don't worry she's very open about it. She doesn't feel the need for aroaces to 'come out' per-say as people don't usually care too much if you don't like anyone."

"That's a good way to look at it."

"Yeah," I say.

* * *

After we were done on the swings we exchanged numbers and went home. I can't believe we might actually be becoming friends. I just need to somehow get over this crush and maybe I won't make a fool of myself.

I'm sitting at the table eating dinner when my dad startles me out of my thoughts.

"So, how was your first day?"

"Oh, uh, it was fine," I reply.

"Make any new friends?" he asks.

"Um, sort of. Just one," I tell him.

"Name?"

"TJ."

"Alright, cool," he says and continues eating.

After I finish my supper, I head upstairs and sit down on my bed. I decide to check my ankle for a soulmate mark, like I do every day before bed. Not like it's ever gonna actually happen, but it's good to have hope.

"Here goes nothing," I whisper to myself.

I pull off my sock to look at my ankle, and gasp when I see it.

There it is, in all it's glory. One simple word is engraved into my skin, right above my foot.

 _Muffin_.


	5. Four // TJ

"Hey, how was school?" my dad asks me as I get inside and set down my backpack.

"Fine," I state, as I grab a hoodie and pull it over my head. "I'm gonna go for a walk, okay?"

"Alright, be back for dinner and don't get into trouble."

"I know, I know. Bye."

I put my earbuds in and head out the door. I have a wide variety of genres and artists that I listen to including Taylor Swift, but right now specifically I'm listening to a playlist I made called 'LGBT Anthems'.

I decide to go to the park. As I'm walking, I think about the boy I helped in the cafeteria today. He looked so sweet and innocent and adorable and I just can't think straight. _Oh no,_ I think. _I have a crush on him, don't I? Not this again!_

I put my face in my hands and mentally scold myself for how I acted earlier. I've really got to get myself together.

When I arrive at the park, I see a kid swinging slowly in the distance. As I get closer, I see that it's the boy from the cafeteria. _Remember, stay calm. Don't say anything stupid,_ I tell myself.

I take one earbud out and approach him, just as 'You Need To Calm Down' by Taylor Swift comes on.

"Hey," I say, grabbing onto the pole of the swing set.

He turns around and stutters, "u-um hi."

"Chocolate chocolate chip muffin, right?" I ask.

He nods. "Scary cafeteria guy," he says while pointing at me.

That kind of hurt. "Actually, TJ."

"I'm Cyrus."

"Do you come here a lot?"

 _You've got to quit it with the pick-up lines!_ I loudly think to myself.

"Yeah, kinda. Usually when I feel bad or worried about something," he tells me.

"Does it help?" I ask him.

"It helps me."

"Cool. Let me try." I sit down on the swing next to him, finally focusing in on the song again.

"So what are you listening to?" he asks, and points at the earbud in my ear.

My eyes practically pop out of my head as I frantically pull the earbud out and hide it in my hoodie pocket.

 _You idiot,_ I think. _Why did you put on that playlist?_

"Uh, nothing. It's not important," I insist, and start to swing really high.

"This is so fun! Come on, swing higher!" I tell him.

"No thanks. I don't swing higher than this. It's safer this way," he declines.

"Oh, come on, it'll be fun!"

I jump off the swing and go behind him, starting to push him higher.

"Ahh!" he screams as he gets higher and higher on the swing. "Ahhh!!"

"Underdog!" I yell, and run under the swing.

"That was exhilarating! But no more please," he says.

"Aw. Okay, fine," I fake pout.

"So, you gonna tell me what you were listening to now, or?" he asks, turning to face me.

"Um..." I start. I decide to just tell him the artist name, even though that might still be embarrassing for a boy. **(A/N that's not my opinion it's just a common stereotype)** It's a lot better than telling him the song title, though.

"Yes?" he encourages me to continue.

"Taylor Swift," I mumble quietly under my breath.

"I couldn't hear you, TJ."

"Taylor Swift!" I mumble again.

"TJ...I'm not gonna make fun of you. It's fine, everyone has different music taste."

"It's Taylor Swift," I state bluntly.

"Oh, cool. I like her music. What song?"

I internally panic again, he can't know that I was listening to that song, then he'll know I'm gay.

Still panicking, I blurt out a random song title of hers, "Uh-uh, Don't Blame Me!"

Immediately he forms a smirk on his face and says, "that's a pretty relationship-based song. Does somebody have a crush?"

"What, no! It's just a cool sounding song, ya know?" I try to cover it up.

"Oh, alright," he drops it, as I get on the swing again.

"So what about you? That girl that was with you in the cafeteria, is she your girlfriend?" I decide to ask, feeling the need to know for sure.

He sort of fake chokes and then for some reason starts laughing.

"No, most definitely not. She's just been my best friend for a long time, so she's very protective of me. I've never liked her like that and she doesn't either," he informs me.

"How do you know for sure she doesn't like you?" I inquire.

"She's ace and aromantic so she doesn't like anyone that way."

"Oh. Is she okay with you telling me that?"

"Oh, yeah don't worry she's very open about it. She doesn't feel the need for aroaces to 'come out' per-say as people don't usually care to much if you don't like anyone."

"That's a good way to look at it."

"Yeah," he says.

"I should get going," I tell him. "I have to be back by 5."

"Yeah, me too." He stands up and steadies the swing.

"Hey, do you want to um, exchange numbers? Maybe you could come over some time and play video games or something," I ask, trying to suggest things that sound like a regular friendship hang, so he doesn't think I'm flirting.

"Yeah, sure. Why not?" he says, and takes out his phone.

We type in each other's numbers and I set his contact as 'Muffin' and then realize there's no muffin emoji to put after his name. Oh well. Good enough.

* * *

Later that night, as I'm changing into my pyjamas, I notice something on my ankle, shining in the light. I stop to look closer and see it. My soulmate mark. And it says...

_Scary Cafeteria Guy._

Woah.


	6. Five // Cyrus

Okay, what? TJ is my soulmate? I don't know what to think. I mean, yeah, I like him but I just met him. Oh gosh. What if he finds out that we're soulmates and he freaks out and I scare him off? I've got to keep this a secret. Yeah, that's what I'll do for now. It's for the best.

But wait, I called him Scary Cafeteria Guy...that means he'll have a mark too! Ugh. He's probably already seen it and is going to avoid me now. Just my luck. _Alright, just calm down. Maybe he hasn't seen it yet,_ I think. _Don't panic. Just go with the flow. See what happens._

* * *

The next day after school, I get a text from TJ.

**TJ: hey. wanna come over**

**n play mario cart?**

_delivered 2:36 pm_

Wait, now what do I do? I don't want to make a fool of myself, but I also really like him and want to hang out with him. But we're also soulmates so I mean it can't be that bad, right?

**Muffin: sure, right now?**

_delivered 2:38 pm_

**TJ: yeah if u want.**

_delivered 2:39 pm_

**Muffin: ok whats ur address**

_delivered 2:39 pm_

**TJ: {current location sent}**

_delivered 2:39 pm_

**Muffin: oh cool we live on**

**the same street. omw**

_**read** 2:40 pm_

I quickly yell upstairs to my mom that I'm going to a friend's.

"Okay honey, have fun!" she shouts back.

I slip my shoes on and put on my jacket and then head out the door. As I'm walking down the sidewalk, I mentally prepare myself for when I see TJ. I can't stutter, blush, or say anything weird. I have to keep my cool. And whatever happens, I cannot let TJ know about my soulmate mark before he admits his.

Once I get to his house, I walk up the steps and carefully knock on the door. Immediately the door opens and I see TJ standing there with a big grin on his face.

"Hey Cyrus, come on in," he tells me.

I follow him inside and take my coat off. He hangs it up for me while I pull my shoes off.

"So, where are we gon-" I start to ask, but he cuts me off.

"Right this way, the game system is downstairs."

"Oh, alright," I say before walking behind him towards the basement door.

When we get there, he turns on the console and puts in the game disc. He hands me a controller and we select our characters.

* * *

After we finish playing Mario Cart, he suggests we play truth or dare. So we both sit down on the couch and he gestures for me to start.

"Okay, truth or dare?" I ask him.

"Dare," he answers.

"I dare you to... sing the theme song to Phineas and Ferb," I smirk.

"Fine, but I'm warning you, I'm not a good singer," he informs me, before proceeding to sing the song.

When he finishes. I applaud him, adding in a little "whoo!" for fun.

"TJ, that was amazing!" I tell him honestly.

He rolls his eyes and says, "whatever."

"You should have faith in yourself, Mr. 'not-a-good-singer'. You're great at singing," I insist.

"Alright, okay," he says, annoyed. "Truth or dare?"

"Um...truth."

"Do you have a crush?"

That killed me.

Okay, not actually. But it was very hard to hold back my panic. I bite the left side of my lip and take a deep breath before replying.

"Yeah," I respond in a small voice.

"Okay. Your turn," he tells me casually. Well that wasn't as disastrous as I thought it would be.

"Oh, right," I mentally facepalm. "T-truth or dare?"

I take a sharp breath after realizing I just stuttered. _How stupid can you get?_ I scold myself in my head.

"Truth."

"Why were you expelled from your old school?"

"How did you know I was expelled?"

My eyes widen as I realize I might've just overstepped.

"I'm sorry, I guess I just assumed since I saw you in the cafeteria but not in my class. You don't have to answer if you don't-"

"It's okay," he interrupts me. "I got expelled for beating someone up. But I only did it because the person I punched was bullying another kid. I couldn't let them get away with it."

"Oh. Well that's nice you did that for the kid. But you could get a teacher if that happens again. I don't think anyone should be hurt."

"I know, I should have done that instead. I sort of have a bit of an anger problem but I'm trying to get better. This situation just made me feel really bad I guess and I felt like I had to do something immediately." His eyes look- hurt? Like something happened to him. I feel bad for bringing this up.

"I'm sorry for asking, I didn't realize," I apologize. "Anyway, it's your turn if you want to keep going."

"Don't worry, it's alright. And yeah I'll take my turn now," he responds. "Truth or dare?"

* * *

"Do you have your soulmate mark yet?" TJ asks me, about half an hour into the game.

Remind me why I agreed to play this game? I should have known something would go wrong.

"Yes."

"Okay, it's your turn."

"Wait, TJ..." I start.

"What's wrong?" he asks me, concerned.

"I have to tell you something," I gulp. It's now or never.

"Oh." He looks uncomfortable. "What is it?"

"Um....I like you. And um, my-my soulmate mark says...muffin," I tell him, nervously.

"I know," he whispers, closing his eyes.

"What?" I say, the words barely escaping my mouth in a scratchy voice.

"Mine says scary cafeteria guy," he mutters, eyes still closed. Great, just great. He's upset. I've ruined everything. I shouldn't have said anything.

"I'm sorry," I tell him sadly in a small voice. "I just...shouldn't have told you."

"Don't apologize. It had to be brought up at some point. I like you too...I'm just not ready," he tells me, looking defeated.

"Why not?" I ask, before realizing it sounded rude. "I'm-I'm sorry I didn't mean-"

"Please just go."

"But TJ I-"

"Leave, Cyrus. I'll talk to you another time." He sounds irritated but at the same time his voice is breaking.

"I'm sorry," I whisper out once more before running upstairs and out the front door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M CRINGING SO BADLY AT THE OVERDRAMATIZATION IN THIS CHAPTER.
> 
> I wrote this chapter like half a year ago or more okay so don’t judge😂
> 
> Also sorry for the cliffhanger. But there’s only two days between chapters so you’ll probably be fine lol


	7. Six // TJ

After Cyrus leaves I collapse sideways onto the couch and start bawling. What have I done? I'm such an idiot. I just got so scared of people finding out and judging me that I panicked. He probably hates me now. Just another classic TJ move. Why does everything I get involved with always shatter into a million pieces?

* * *

I wake up the next morning and roll over in bed, groaning. My eyes are swollen shut from all the crying I did last night. You know that feeling when you're so upset that it feels like everything hurts, but not in your actual body? Yeah, well, that's what's happening. I try get myself to sit up but my brain won't let me.

I feel like such an awful person. Like usual, my stupid insecure self took everything out on the person I care most about. Now I've made it seem like I'm mad at him when he's done nothing wrong! He's never gonna want to talk to me again. I don't even know why I'm already so attached to him when I just met him less than 48 hours ago. It's just something about him made me feel warm inside. Like I wasn't alone anymore. I guess that's gone now. No way am I going to school today.

My mom never bothers to come get me up because I'm supposed to be 'responsible' and 'learn how to manage myself' or whatever. So after about five minutes of trying, I finally manage to grab my phone off my nightstand and text her.

**TJ: i'm not feeling well so**

**i'm going back to sleep**

_delivered 8:23 am_

Not technically a lie so that'll do. I'm not feeling well. I just didn't mention that it's not due to sickness. I set down my phone and pull the blanket over my head, trying to fall back asleep. But I can't get his stupidly cute face out of my head! And it just makes me feel worse, because I want more than anything to be able so see him again, but I don't think _he_ wants to see _me_.

Eventually, sleep overtakes me and I drift into one of my usual nonsensical dreams, no longer having to worry about the real world.

* * *

When I wake up again, I check my alarm clock and it says 3PM. _Did I really sleep all day?_

I pick up my phone and see three new text messages. The first is from my mom, so I open it up and text her back.

**Mom: ok sweetie, hope you**

**feel better**

_delivered 9:11 am_

**TJ: thanks. just woke up,**

**i'm gonna go eat now**

_delivered 3:02 pm_

Then I look at who sent the other two messages.

Cyrus.

Should I open it, or pretend I never received it? I'm scared it's gonna be something about last night. I'm not prepared for that. It'll probably just make me cry again. After several minutes of debating with myself, I click on the conversation and read the messages.

**Muffin: hey**

_delivered 2:06 pm_

**Muffin: I know you probably**

**don't want to talk to me right**

**now, but I wanted to know if**

**you're ok. I didn't see you at**

**school at all today.**

_delivered 2:08 pm_

**TJ: i'm fine, just a bit**

**sick.**

_delivered 3:09 pm_

Just as I'm about to turn my phone off, I suddenly see the words change on the screen.

_**read** 3:10 pm_

Panicked when I see the typing bubble appear, I frantically force-close the app and lock my phone screen. I then lie down on my back and press my phone to my chest, sighing anxiously. Not even 10 seconds later, I hear my phone ding and momentarily look at the screen. It's from Cyrus, but I have my message previews turned off for when my phone is locked.

I decide to ignore it for now, and steadily get up out of bed before tossing my phone onto my pillow. Once I've finished stretching, I walk out of my room and down the stairs to the kitchen. My parents are both at work today, so I don't have to worry about them pestering me with questions for why I look like a deranged zombie right now.

I make myself some instant oatmeal and sit at the table. I use my spoon to pick at it for a bit, and then slowly start to eat. I haven't had oatmeal in a while, so I forgot how weird it tastes. It kind of makes me want to spit it out but I'm too lazy at the moment to even do that. So I just continue eating it until it's finally finished. I wash it down with some milk before putting my dishes in the sink.

After that, I head into the living room and lie down on the couch. I grab the remote and turn on the TV, flipping the channels to some random cartoon. I set down the remote on the ottoman and lay back, as I try to focus on whatever's happening onscreen rather than the thoughts in my head.


	8. Seven // Cyrus

It's been 22 minutes since TJ replied to my messages, and 20 minutes since I texted back. But he hasn't responded or even read it yet. I'm lying down on my back on the floor of my bedroom as I stare at the last two messages I sent.

**Muffin: I hope you feel**

**better.**

_delivered 3:10 pm_

**Muffin: I'm sorry if I've**

**upset you.**

_delivered 3:11 pm_

I feel terrible about what happened with TJ last night. It's all my fault for bringing up the stupid soulmate thing. I _knew_ he probably wouldn't be ready and yet I told him anyway! And I also accidentally used a rude sounding tone when I asked why he wasn't ready; I'm such an idiot.

He probably hates me now, and now I'll never be happy again because I've turned my own soulmate against me. Maybe I'm just not cut out for this. This soulmate thing. This, relationship thing. This _'being happy'_ thing. Maybe I'm just destined to be alone forever.

* * *

The next morning, I grab my phone as I walk to the washroom to brush my teeth. I see that I have a message from TJ. Hoping that it's good news or at least neutral, I click the notification to open the conversation.

**TJ: don't say sorry. you**

**did nothing wrong.**

_delivered 12:59 am_

**Muffin: ok...if you're sure**

_delivered 8:17 am_

**Muffin: are you going to**

**school today?**

_delivered 8:18 am_

It's kind of pointless to ask at this point, since he was still up at like one in the morning. He'd most likely be too tired. But it's worth a shot, I guess.

After I finish brushing my teeth, I head downstairs and sit at the table, where my mom has already set a bowl of cereal for me. I quickly eat it up, and then sling my backpack over my shoulder, before heading out the door. I just hope my mom won't bombard me with annoying questions all the way to school like yesterday.

* * *

At lunch time, I stand in line with May, once again praying for a chocolate chocolate chip muffin. I count the muffins and the people in line in front of me. There's actually more than enough this time! Yes! This is such a great day.

A few minutes later, with only 3 people left in front of me, I excitedly anticipate the delicious muffin that will be in my hands in less than 5 minutes. I impatiently tug on my sleeve, silently being very thankful that nobody took more than one.

"Incoming," May suddenly says to me, irritatedly. I see her roll her eyes before I turn to the door.

TJ walks into the cafeteria and he instantly makes eye contact with me. He stops in his tracks and our gazes lock on each other for a few moments.

Then, he spins around and rushes out the door. I shake my head and sigh as I turn back around to see that I've reached the counter. I grab a muffin and discontentedly tap my foot as I wait for May to finish getting her food.

As we walk back to our classroom, May taps my shoulder and says, "question."

"Shoot," I respond, trying not to let my mood show.

"What was _that_ about?" she asks, using her gaze to motion towards the cafeteria door.

"What do you mean?" I question, acting oblivious.

"Oh, come on, Cyrus. You know what I mean."

"I don't believe I do."

"Cyrus, don't do this right now. I'm your best friend. Tell me what's going on." She puts a hand on my shoulder.

"I...can't say," I tell her, giving in.

"Why not?" she asks, puzzled.

"Um, I just can't."

"Please, Cyrus? I want to help with whatever is happening."

"You can't help. I can't out-" I cut myself off, realizing what I just said. _Crud, how do I backtrack from this?!_

"What?" she says, clearly confused.

"I-I can't out myself to him." _That works._

"What does that have to do with anything that just happened?"

"Um..." I trail off.

"What is it?"

"We kiiinda maybebecamefriendsmondaydontkillme," I blurt out really fast.

"Cyrus," she starts seriously. "I'm going to turn around right now and pinch myself and you had better _pray_ that I'm dreaming and wake up, because if not, you're toast."

As I shrink down in slight fear, I squeeze my eyes shut and wait for the rupturing of my ears.

4, 3, 2, 1-

"WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!" May whisper-shouts in my face. Right, I forgot — we're in the middle of school so she can't actually scream at me. I open my eyes to see her looking at me expectantly and disappointedly at the same time.

"I dunno, I dunno!" I raise my hands in defence. "I'm sorry. He found me at the park after school and he was nice to me! I have no idea why but _he's_ the one who wanted to be friends with _me_. I just- he's not as bad as he seems, alright?"

"We have to do our work now, but after school you're coming over and explaining this whole situation," she whispers. "Including how that cafeteria event has to do with not outing yourself, because honestly I'm very confused."

"Fine, fine, I'll be there."

We sit down at our desks and continue to work on our separate assignments.

* * *

When the bell rings signalling the end of the school day, I pack up my things and text my mom. She's always 30 minutes late so I don't have to worry about her already being on her way.

**Cyrus: I'm going to May's**

**house so you don't have to**

**pick me up from school.**

**But could you pick me up**

**from her house later?**

_**read** 2:02 pm_

**Mom: ok have a good**

**time! Text me when**

**you're ready for me**

**to come pick you up.**

**Love you.**

_delivered 2:03 pm_

May and I walk outside together in silence. Her house is close by so she walks to and from school. As we walk, I think about what I'm going to tell her when we get to her house. I can't tell her the full truth, since that would include telling her about TJ being my soulmate. It's TJ's choice who to come out to and when. I can't out him, that's wrong, no matter whether or not I know the person is supportive.

I soon come up with a cover story, that includes part truth, and part lie to cover up the part I can't tell her. We arrive at her house and she leads me to her room where I will have to, and I quote, 'spill the beans'.

I sit next to her on the bed and she immediately turns to me and says, "explain."

I gulp before responding, "why don't we play a game instead?"

"Okay, let's play a game," she tells me and I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding.

"Great! What game should we play?"

"Oh! I have an idea. Let's play a game called 'Tell me what happened'. Here's how it works: I sit here and listen to you, and you _tell me what happened_."

"Guess I'm not getting out of this, am I?" I sigh in defeat.

"Nope."

"Fine. I went to the swings after school the first day, and at some point he walked up behind me and said hey. I said hi back and he told me his name was TJ so I said I was Cyrus. He started swinging next to me and I asked him what he was listening to because I saw he had one earbud in. He wouldn't tell me though and changed the subject by telling me to swing higher because it was fun. I declined and told him I don't swing high because it's safer not to. Then he jumped off his swing and pushed me higher on the swing before running underneath and I screamed a bit but then said it was exhilarating, but not to do it again so he was like aw okay. After that I asked him again what he was listening to and finally got it out of him. And somehow the conversation got to him asking me if you were my girlfriend and so I laughed and told him definitely not and that we were best friends and neither of us had ever liked each other that way. He was like, 'how do you know for sure she doesn't like you?' and so I told him you're aroace and don't like anyone like that. Then he had to go home and he asked to exchange numbers so we could hang out to play video games sometime so I accepted. And that's how we became friends."

"Woah," she says. "I did not expect that. I thought he was with the expelled kids."

"Well, he is, but that doesn't make him evil. Everyone makes bad decisions sometimes," I tell her.

"Fair enough. So what was with that cafeteria incident? If you guys are friends why would he avoid you?"

"Right. That. Um. Are you sure I have to tell you?" I ask, hoping I could get a pass and not have to lie to her.

"Yes. Again, I'm your best friend, so I need full disclosure," she tells me.

"Alright. Well, I went to his house to play Mario Cart the next day, and we ended up playing truth or dare after," I explain, preparing for the next part to be a lie. "He asked me a question which I refused to answer, because the answer would reveal my orientation, and now he's mad at me. End of story."

"Okay, and you were reluctant to tell me this because...?"

_Because I don't like lying to my best friend._

"I don't know, I guess I was worried you'd kill him or something," I tell her, nervously laughing.

"Oh, I'm definitely gonna kill him, but you don't have to worry about that," she says, looking at me with the straightest face ever.

"MAY!" I whine.

"Cyrus, I'm kidding!" she says and bursts out laughing. "I won't step in unless you want me to."

"Thank you," I breathe, holding in a laugh.


	9. Eight // TJ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *trigger warning for the dream*
> 
> Also, short chapter.

I stare at my ceiling, trying to fall asleep. It's 2:14AM and I'm still awake because I can't clear my mind. It feels like there's a storm going on in my head, with endless thoughts of Cyrus rushing through like waves crashing onto the shore. And I want so desperately for it to end, so I can surface from the water that's trying to drown me. But I can't, because I'm being pushed under so strongly that I might never come back up.

I don't want for this to be happening. Giving in means accepting myself which means coming out which leads to losing people and I can't handle even thinking about that. Nobody would ever look at me the same. And while I really do like Cyrus, being with him could change the course of my entire life. I don't know if I'm ready for that.

I check the time again and it's now 3:01. Guess I'm not going to school tomorrow. After what feels like an eternity, I finally manage to fall asleep. But maybe that's not such a good thing.

***

_"TJ! Please help me!" I hear Cyrus cry from a distance._

_I struggle beneath the chains that hold me to the corner of this dark room. There are spikes all around, so even if I got loose I'd be in danger._

_"You hear that, princess?" a man sneers from just outside of my prison. "The little crybaby wants you!"_

_The three shorter guys around him laugh mockingly._

_"LEAVE HIM ALONE!" I scream as I try to break away._

_"TJ! Help!" Cyrus shrieks once more._

_"Too late for that," one guy smirks at me. "He'll be off the cliff in a matter of seconds."_

_"You should've just stayed in the closet," the main one says before knocking me out._

***

"Cyrus!" I yell as I shoot up into a sitting position, gasping for air. I look around at my surroundings and let out a heavy breath. _Just a dream._

I look over at my alarm clock. 5:21 AM. I'd better get back to sleep. I really hope I don't have another nightmare like that.

* * *

I wake up at noon and immediately check my phone. I have 2 new messages from my mom.

**Mom: I heard you were**

**still trying to fall asleep**

**past 2 in the morning so**

**I called the school and**

**told them you probably**

**wouldn't be coming in**

**today.**

_delivered 7:34 am_

**Mom: I'm going to be**

**at a conference most**

**of the day but I hope**

**you feel better honey.**

**Rest well, okay?**

_delivered 8:09 am_

**TJ: thanks mom.**

_delivered 12:02 pm_

I head downstairs and grab a cereal bar. After getting my shoes on, I quickly eat the whole bar and then throw the plastic wrapper in the recycling. I slip my hoodie over my head and then head out the door, walking to the park.

Since it's the middle of the school day, I know Cyrus won't be there, which means I can swing alone and try to eliminate my worried thoughts. As I walk down the sidewalk, I put my earbuds in and hit shuffle on my 'Random Meme Stuff' playlist. I usually put that on when I want to rid my mind of deep thoughts.

Once I approach the familiar swing set, I sit down and start to push myself back and forth, swinging higher until I'm at the same height I was last time. I continue to focus on the song playing from my headphones, and soon I'm feeling happy and free once again.

I stay there for quite awhile, just lost in the music. No worries, no sadness, no anxiety about the future.

Just as I'm slowing down, ready to check the time, I see a figure jogging towards me. Make that...two? I squint my eyes as they slowly come into view. It's Cyrus. And...his best friend. I don't know what her name is. _Crud._

I swiftly stand up and pull the cord of my earbuds out of my phone, shoving them into my pocket. But as I turn around, ready to leave, Cyrus calls out my name.

"TJ!" Cyrus shouts. "Wait a sec, I'm almost there."

_That's what I was afraid of._


	10. Nine // Cyrus

TJ wasn't at school today, so I assumed he was sick again. But as I approach the park with May, I spot him on the swing set and realize that I might've been wrong. I start to jog towards him and May struggles to catch up to me.

"Cyrus, what are you doing?" she asks me, already out of breath. "Didn't you say he's angry with you?"

Just then, TJ looks over and notices us, and I see him getting ready to leave.

"TJ! Wait a sec, I'm almost there," I call out.

He freezes in place and shrivels into himself, before slowly taking his seat again. I feel my heart sinking, but I don't turn around. I need to talk to him.

"Do you hear anything I'm saying? Am I just invisible?" May says, exasperatedly.

I stop and turn to her, and she halts in front of me once she catches up.

"I'm sorry, May, but I really need to talk to him alone right now. It's important," I explain to her. "Can you stay here for now?"

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" she frowns, looking concerned.

"Yes, I'm sure. I can handle it. Trust me."

She reluctantly nods. "Okay. Just be careful."

"I will, don't worry," I assure her. "I'll be back in like ten minutes maybe. Possibly fifteen? Don't worry though, I'm just not sure how long the conversation will be."

After that, she sits down on a nearby bench and pulls out her phone, while I quickly head over to the swings.

Once I approach where TJ is sitting, I take a deep breath and greet him. "Hey."

He looks up from the ground and gives me a timid smile. "Hi."

"Is it alright if I sit?" I gesture to the swing next to him.

"Sure."

I take a seat on my usual swing, and push myself forward lightly. The silence feels tense and awkward, but I honestly don't know how to start this conversation. TJ eventually pushes forward and starts swinging along with me. He hasn't put his earbuds back in, though, so I feel like he's waiting for me to say something.

"So..." I start.

"I'm really sorry for avoiding you," he blurts out.

It takes me a moment to react, because I was startled by his sudden statement.

"Okay," I respond.

"I-I really do like you, it's just- I'm scared," he admits, quietly.

"You know you don't have to apologize, right?" I tell him, gently. "I understand you not being ready."

"Really?" He turns to look at me.

"Of course. I wouldn't want to force you to go out or anything if you're uncomfortable. That wouldn't be fair on you."

"Thank you, Cy. That means a lot."

"It's no problem," I assure him. "Do you maybe want to talk about anything that's bothering you specifically? If not, that's okay, too."

Sighing, he grips the chains on his swing. "I don't know. I just- I've never really talked about this sort of thing with anybody. I don't even know if...if I'd know what to say."

"What about this: can you tell me what it is, in particular, that you're afraid of?" I offer.

"I guess just judgement; or loss, predominantly."

"And can you explain more?" I ask, benevolently. "If you're comfortable."

"I'm scared of having to come out because I know there will be unaccepting people and I don't want to lose anyone," he admits.

"I understand that. It took me a long time to come out to my parents, and I'm lucky they accept me, but not everyone is."

"If you don't mind me asking, I already know you're not...straight, but are you...?"

"Gay. I'm gay."

"Me too," he says, quietly.

"There's nothing wrong with you, you know that?" I tell him. "It's just like any other trait you have. Like, your eye colour, or your blond hair, or your height. It's a part of who you are."

"Yeah, I know, I just...wish other people knew that, too."

"So do I, but you know what? If someone can't accept you for who you are that's their problem, not yours," I continue. "But regardless of that, it's your choice who you come out to and when. Nobody else gets to decide that."

"Thanks. I just hope you understand why I'm not ready."

"Of course I do. But I just want you to know that, if in the future we did go out, I'd be perfectly fine with not telling anyone if you didn't want to," I inform him. "I don't want you to think I would ever make you come out."

"Do you really mean that? You wouldn't feel, I don't know, like trapped or anything?" he asks me.

"Yes, I really mean it. I completely get the fear of telling people these things, and I'd never pressure anyone to do so."

"That...means a lot. I kind of just assumed that dating someone would automatically require being out."

"Well, not everyone is like that, and if they are, that's honestly kind of insensitive."

"I guess you're right," he smiles slightly.

"Feel better now?" I question, returning the expression.

"Yeah, yeah I really do. Thank you."

"Any time," I assure him.

Once a few minutes have passed by of just swinging, and enjoying the peaceful atmosphere, the silence is broken again.

"Cyrus?" he speaks up, quietly.

"Yeah?" I respond, looking at the flowers in the distance.

"Would...would you like to go out with me?"

I immediately stop my swing and my eyes widen, as I look over towards him. "Are you sure? I thought you weren't ready."

After a moment, he nods assuredly. "I'm sure. If it can stay secret, I'm fine."

I can barely keep the grin off my face as I respond calmly, "then I'd love to."

* * *

Soon after we'd agreed to go out, I remembered that May was still waiting for me, so I told TJ I had to go. Now I'm walking home with her and she has yet to ask me what happened.

"May? You okay?" I ask.

She looks up from her phone. "Yeah, why?"

"I just thought you'd have asked me what happened by now," I chuckle.

"Oh, well you said you had to talk to him alone so I assumed it was private."

"Alright, well I appreciate that," I tell her. "But I can tell you're worried. Everything's alright, it was just a misunderstanding and we worked it out."

"That's great. Also, I'm glad I didn't have to come with you, because I really hate confrontation," she says. "So are you guys are friends again?"

"Yep."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me, projecting onto May? That's so crazy? I don't know what you mean, why would I do that...
> 
> Okay, I'm projecting onto May in this chapter, what about it😝


	11. Ten // TJ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick note: I put TJ's favourite cereal as corn pops in this chapter, and I wanted to say that's not my personal favourite so don't kill me if you hate it lol. I just randomly picked one of the many cereals I like and I wanted to use one that wasn't super sugary, so that's what I thought of. I feel like a really sweet one would more likely be Cyrus' favourite.
> 
> Also, mild trigger warning sort of? It isn't really much, but personally yelling makes me really uncomfortable/anxious so I thought I'd warn you that TJ kind of freaks out at his mom for a moment. That's all.

When I wake up in the morning, I check my phone and realize it's Saturday. That means there's no school today. Perfect. I can just sleep in, relax, and...

 _Wait a minute,_ I think, the memories of yesterday returning to me. _Oh my gosh. I have a date with Cyrus. I have a **date** with **Cyrus**! How did this happen? Is this even real life?! This is the best day to-_

*BZZ! BZZ!*

_**{reminder: 🌳❤️2hrs}** _

My thoughts are interrupted when I see a reminder pop up on my lock screen, titled with a tree emoji, a heart, and the text '2hrs'. That's what I put down as a code for 'park date in 2 hours', in case someone steals my phone. Maybe I'm being a bit too paranoid but whatever.

We're going to the swings, because it's basically our place now. We agreed on each bringing food: Cyrus is bringing a bag of smartfood popcorn and I'm bringing chocolate chocolate chip muffins that I'm going to pick up from the bakery on the way. It's the perfect plan and I'm so excited!

I check the time and see that it's 9:01 AM. Well, I mean I kind of expected so, as I did set the reminder for 9. Unlocking my phone, I go straight to messages to text Cyrus, but a message comes through from him right as the app opens. Obviously, I text back immediately.

**Muffin: good morning! are**

**we still on for the swings?**

_delivered 9:01 AM_

**TJ: of course, and I'm still**

**bringing the muffins so**

**get ready :)**

_delivered 9:02 AM_

**Muffin: great! i've got the**

**popcorn. is white cheddar**

**okay? I have other flavours**

**if not**

_delivered 9:02 AM_

**TJ: white cheddar is**

**great, no worries.**

**Looking forward to it!**

_delivered 9:03 AM_

**TJ: I'm gonna go have**

**breakfast now though, see**

**you Cy :D**

_**read** 9:03 AM_

**Muffin: bye teej :)**

_delivered 9:03 AM_

As I set my phone back down on my nightstand, I hop out of bed and start rummaging through my drawers for something to wear. Once I've settled on an outfit, I go to the bathroom to get changed and do my hair.

After I'm done, I brush my teeth for double my usual time before heading downstairs. My mom is already seated at the table drinking tea and eating her omelette. Guess I missed my chance of having eggs for breakfast.

I greet her with a "good morning," and then walk over to the cabinet to grab a bowl, before searching for my favourite cereal. Finally, I find it behind all the other trashy bland cereals like original 'Mini Wheats' and plain 'Cheerios'. What's even the point of plain Cheerios? I like the flavoured ones, but the plain version is kind of like if you were to eat a slice of bread on its own.

While pouring myself the Corn Pops, I start thinking about what's going to happen on my date with Cyrus. Pretty soon I'm overthinking, and I know I shouldn't be, but I can't help it. So much could go wrong, what if I say the wrong thing and upset him? Or somehow make him hate me?! I really couldn't handle that.

The moment I reach for the milk in the fridge, I realize that I'm shaking. That's not a good sign. Casually, I retract my hand and close the fridge, quietly walking over to the living room to avoid catching my mom's attention. I sit down on the couch and close my eyes, taking deep breaths to try and steady myself.

 _There's nothing to be worried about,_ I tell myself. _Cyrus likes you, and you like him. It will be fine. He's understanding, he's kind, he won't care if you're weird, or awkward, or have a different opinion or whatever. There is nothing to be worried about._

When I feel myself relaxing, I breathe a sigh of relief and stride back to the kitchen where I left my cereal. Opening the fridge again, I grab the milk and begin to pour it on top.

"Don't forget to put the milk back when you're done, okay sweetie?" my mom speaks up.

 _Does she think I'm 8 years old or something?_ I roll my eyes as I consciously put the milk down on the counter as gently as possible, so I don't end up slamming it down. "I know, mom," I reply, straining to keep the bitterness out of my voice. "I always put it back."

Breathing in deeply, I open the drawer next to me and take out a spoon, putting it into the bowl. Then I take the milk and open the fridge back up, placing it on the top shelf, like usual.

"Alright, and did you brush your teeth?" she asks, in a seemingly benevolent manner, but her tone goes in one ear and out the other.

Slamming the fridge shut, I spin around and shout, "of _course_ I brushed my teeth! It's in my daily routine! I _always_ brush my teeth! Not once have I forgotten, and-"

I cut myself off, the gasp my mom made from my sudden outburst registering in my mind. The mortification sinks in and shows on my face.

"I- I'm so sorry mom, I-" I start to say, gulping back a wave of emotion. "I really didn't mean to yell at you. I've just been really anxious about... um, school stuff, but I know that's not an excuse and I'm really sorry. I shouldn't have flipped out, I swear I'm trying to be better."

She looks at me kindly and tells me, "It's okay, TJ. I know you didn't mean it. Also, the appointment we booked you last month for the psychiatrist is coming up next week, so hopefully that might help."

Right. The psychiatrist. I'm probably just gonna be given like a stupid medicine prescription or some trash like that. Which will just be a constant reminder of my issues. _Great._

Sighing, I mutter a "thanks," and take my cereal over to the table. After sitting down in my seat, I pick up my spoon and begin to eat.

* * *

An hour or so later, I'm sitting on the couch watching a rerun of my favourite TV movie. Suddenly, my phone goes off with my alarm and I realize it's time to leave. I shut off the television and stand up, unlocking my phone to text Cyrus.

**TJ: I'm leaving now**

_delivered 10:30 AM_

**TJ: don't worry though**

**you don't have to leave yet**

**if you're close by, it's just**

**because I have to stop at**

**the bakery for the muffins**

**yk :)**

_delivered 10:31 AM_

After about 12 seconds, the text changes, followed by a typing bubble.

_**read** 10:31 AM_

Cyrus' reply appears just moments following this.

**Muffin: alright, I'll see you**

**there then! :D**

_delivered 10:31 AM_

Once I've stuffed my phone in my pocket, I shout up to my mom that I'm going out for a bit. She calls back down, confirming that she's heard me, and I proceed to walk over to the door, swiftly forcing my shoes on. I open the door, stepping outside, and I'm instantly hit with a cold breeze, making me go back in to grab a hoodie.

The moment I've got it on, I step back outside and close the door. I've got to hurry if I want to get there in time, this bakery is pretty popular and I might have to wait in line. With this in mind, I start to jog down the sidewalk, careful not to trip over the cracks. I don't need _anything_ slowing me down.

Within about 10 minutes, I arrive at the bakery, which is named Joe's. When I enter the small building, I immediately head over to the end of the line, and it's surprisingly not as long as I thought it would be.

The line moves by rapidly, and soon enough it's my turn to order. I ask for a four pack of chocolate chocolate chip muffins, to which I am asked how I will be paying. Seeing as I'm only sixteen, the obvious answer is cash. I pay for the muffins, grab the bag they were put in, and move towards the exit.

Only 5 minutes later is when I reach the park. Sitting down on the swing, I check the time and see that it's 10 to. After setting down the paper bag next to me on the ground, I shove my phone into my pocket and start to swing forwards.

I lose track of time pretty quickly, and soon I hear a voice from behind me.

"Hey, Teej!"

When I turn around, Cyrus is standing there with the most adorable smile on his face. I'm so glad this is finally happening.

"Teej? That's new," I comment, grinning widely.

"I thought of it last night!" he tells me as he moves to sit on the swing next to me. Then he hands me one of the snack bags, saying, "here's your popcorn! I hope it's enough. The store only had single serving bags."

"It's perfect, Cy. I got a four pack of muffins. Let me get one out for you."


	12. Bonus: Epilogue

***Time jump***

* * *

It's the boys' six month anniversary, and TJ just wants today to be perfect. So, he's planned a special date for him and Cyrus. He took the classic 'dinner and a movie', and upped it to 100.

In other words, they're going to have a picnic at sundown in the park, where he's set up a makeshift movie screen with a giant white sheet and a projector.It's an incomparable, sensational plan, and he's ecstatic just to see Cyrus' reaction. He really hopes that Cyrus loves it, because in his eyes, he deserves the world.

At 6:30 in the afternoon, he calls Cyrus to make sure he's ready. His parents are out running an errand, so he doesn't need to worry about them overhearing.

"Hello?" Cyrus' voice pipes up from the other end of the line.

"Hey, muffin!" TJ greets. "Are you ready for me to come pick you up?"

"Yeah, definitely. You still haven't told me where we're going, though."

"That's because it's a surprise, love."

"You're so sweet!" Cyrus all but squeals. "Okay, I'll let it slide this once, but you know I have difficulty handling surprises."

"I'll be there in 10 minutes, and just wear your runners, it's only going to be us."

"Okay. See you, Teej."

* * *

Cyrus is currently sitting on the steps to his porch, drumming his hands on his knees. It's still 2 minutes until TJ said he'd be there, but he can't help but feel impatient. He just wants to find out the surprise already! Usually, TJ tells him right away, but this time it has to be a surprise for some reason.

Obviously, Cyrus knows that it's their six-month today, but he doesn't get why he can't know where they're going. What's the difference in knowing now and finding out later? It's not like it'll change what's going to happen.

Finally, he hears the car honk and sees that TJ just pulled up. He's still new to having a boyfriend that drives, so it puts him in awe every time he sees it. It's an older, used car, as TJ's not in any way rich, but the fact that he drives at all is astronomically cool to Cyrus.

He walks up and opens the door to the passenger seat, getting in. After buckling his seatbelt, he turns to TJ.

"Will you tell me where we're going _now_?"

"Nope," TJ replies.

"Ugh, fine."

As TJ backs out of the driveway and starts along the road, Cyrus folds his arms playfully and looks away, out the window. TJ notices, glancing between him and the road and sighing.

"Oh come on, don't give me that."

A minute passes with no response from Cyrus.

"Cy, seriously. We're gonna be there soon," TJ tries. "Please say something."

Silence.

"I guess I'll just have to eat all the treats myself," TJ teasingly says.

Cyrus whips his head around at that.

"Teeej!" he whines, resting a head on his shoulder to apologize. "Do you want me to die?"

"I'm pretty sure you're not gonna die, Cyrus," TJ chuckles. "And I was just kidding. You can have all the treats you want. Besides, we're here now."

TJ pulls into the parking lot, and starts to get out the the car.

"The park?" Cyrus questions. "Isn't this our normal date spot?"

"Just you wait, babe," TJ tells him, not even hiding the grin on his face. "I have to get something from the trunk that's part of the surprise, so I need you to wait here a moment, okay?"

"Alright, you won't be long, will you?"

"No, of course not. I'll just be five minutes tops," TJ assures him. "Be right back."

* * *

After TJ's done setting up the blanket and picnic basket near the movie spot he made earlier, he rushes back to the car and opens the door to where Cyrus is sitting.

"Ready?" TJ asks him, smiling from ear to ear.

"Are you seriously standing there asking me if I'm ready? I've been trying to get you to tell me where we were going for the past half hour. What do _you_ think?"

"Alright, let's go then," TJ laughs and pulls him out of the car, shutting the door behind them.

Holding hands, they sprint off in the direction of TJ's surprise, and soon enough, they're standing right in front of it.

"Surprise!" TJ exclaims, gesturing to the picnic set up, the projector, and the fairy lights hanging from the trees. "Happy six months."

Cyrus just stands there, not saying anything, mouth open wide while staring at everything.

The excitement finally wears off and the nerves start to sink in as TJ waits for a reaction. "...what do you think?"

"What do I-" Cyrus cuts himself off and spins around to face his boyfriend. "TJ this is amazing! How did you do all this? I can't believe this is happening! I have the best boyfriend ever!"

Cyrus finishes his acclamation by engulfing TJ in a huge hug. TJ happily returns the embrace, feeling calm and content once again.

They both enjoy the picnic, filled with chocolate chocolate chip muffins, jokes, single-serving Kraft Dinner cups, and Frozen 2 playing on the screen.

After awhile, TJ remembers something he's been meaning to talk to Cyrus about.

"Hey, Cy?" he speaks up quietly.

"Yeah? Is everything okay?" Cyrus asks, concerned.

"Yeah, yeah everything's great," TJ insists. "Just... I was thinking."

"You were thinking...?" Cyrus prompts.

TJ gulps and spits out, "I think I want to come out to my parents."

"Really? Are you sure?"

"Well, I..."

"It's okay," Cyrus assures him, placing a hand on top of his. "You're okay."

"I mean, I'm about 95 percent sure, I think. I still have a lot of thinking to do," TJ admits. "I just think that...they supported me while starting the new school this year. And they supported me when I started on my anti-anxiety medication. They help me a lot. And I- I just feel bad keeping this from them."

"Whatever you decide, I'm here for you," Cyrus tells him, as he intertwines their hands together. "I'll be right here by your side."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And....we're finished! I hope you all enjoyed this story, please leave your thoughts in the comments below and maybe share it with your friends? This was my first full-length ship fanfiction and I had a lot of fun making it. I have another one I'm in the middle of writing but it won't start to be published until it's done because I procrastinate/lose motivation a LOT and I don't want to leave anyone on a super long cliffhanger lol. Anyway, I hope you all have a great day/night, and remember to take care of yourselves.
> 
> -Amber


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